Thanks to all of you who participated in our Section Membership meeting last month. These are busy times for the Board members and Officers at both the Chapter and Section level as we plan for 2022. Next week, Frank, Chris Nowlen, and I will be off to the PGA annual meeting in Milwaukee, WI.
Today let’s try a little Jeopardy. Today’s Jeopardy clue is “the ability to experience and relate to the thoughts, emotions, or experiences of others.” The question, “what is empathy?”
Empathy is not sympathy. Sympathy is being able to understand and support others with compassion or sensitivity.
If you ask most managers today about what is vital to their success, many would answer controlling, managing, getting results, and making the bottom-line. True, but who makes those things a reality? Their employees do. For years, I have heard managers say, “I don’t have time for the touchy-feely crap.” I think many of us believe that is what their bosses would say. A recent study conducted by the Center for Creative Leadership found that managers who practice empathetic leadership towards direct reports find those employees are better performers in their jobs. Have I got your attention now?
Managers who relate to their employees in a caring and compassionate manner see a difference in their performance. I am not talking about everyone sitting around singing Kumbaya. I am talking about showing your employees that you care about them.
What is the first step? Listening to them. Really listening to them. I will not give a class on active listening, but I will provide you with a simple model you can use. The model is called EAR. It comes for the Blanchard Training and Development Company and it is easy to understand and use.
Explore
Acknowledge
Respond
To Explore, consider using gentle, non-judgmental questions. “I want to make sure I understand you. Would you please say more about that?” This is where you are probing for understanding, using a gentle form of probing, not a blunt force.
Acknowledge is verifying what the person has said by using words like, “you sound really upset; you seem really hurt.” Acknowledge and then be quiet and listen. They may tell you that you have it wrong; they may say “I’m not upset.” If you are not sure, probe again. “If you’re not upset, how are you feeling?”
Responding is critical to the model. By exploring and acknowledging, we show that we understand and are listening. We are not problem-solving. Respond with comments like, “I think I understand. How can I help you?”
Trust me! This is not complicated. However, when you are empathic and compassionate, the other person will know you care.
I hope the one takeaway you get from this is the following: “People don’t care how you much you know once they know how much you care.”
As always, please stay safe, reach out, and contact someone you have not seen or talked to in a while.
Thank you for your time and for all that you do,
Howie Pruitt, PGA
Director, Golf Operations, Aspen Lakes GC
President, Pacific Northwest Section